Post Date December, 03 2023
My husband has been cheating for three years, and we have been separated for six months. I know they haven't stopped. I can't let him go in my heart, but his so-called care for me is so disguised. If I agree to divorce, he will be willing. Perhaps he has been waiting for me to agree to divorce?
How can he and I go back to our hometown for the Chinese New Year as it's about to be celebrated? Family and friends, the entire village knows about this matter, but he is so indifferent that his relatives also say that we can't make our own decisions? Oh my god, what should I do? What should I do when I think of all the things he did to me? Please give me a suggestion so that I know how to face and solve correctly! thank you.
I hate him, but I don't want to let him go, but he looks like he can't go back. Teacher, am I too cowardly? What should I do????
reply:
If emotions become dispensable, if marriage becomes a form, it's better to make a quick decision and plan ahead rather than living a miserable life like this. Perhaps letting go is the wisest choice. Knowing that the other party no longer loves you, and knowing that their relationship and marriage have reached an impasse, why should they feel wronged?
In marriage, the weak can only be harmed in the end. Therefore, every woman needs to have a strong attitude in her heart. Only through self-improvement can she be saved from the cage of marriage. Why do many women, when facing betrayal and infidelity from their husbands, become angry and compromise at the same time? Feeling resentful while unable to part? To investigate, there are no more than the following reasons:
Firstly, the ability to make money is poor and the economy is not self-sufficient
Faced with a man's infidelity, most women are in agony, heartbroken, and don't know what to do after that? Those women who were shouting loudly about divorce from men couldn't make up their minds in the end. One of the reasons for this is that one has poor earning power and lacks sufficient confidence in the economy. Therefore, one has to choose compromise and turn a blind eye. If a woman can achieve economic independence and live without looking at the man's face, then there is no need to make herself suffer. At the same time, this man also dare not easily choose to betray you.
Secondly, the spirit and personality are not independent
After a man's infidelity, women dare not persist in fighting and resisting him. The most effective trick is usually to cry, make trouble, and hang themselves. Little did they know that such methods were not clever enough and were simply not effective, and could only have a counterproductive effect in men's eyes. The reason why women do this is because their spirit and personality are not independent, and they always believe that they are an appendage to men. Without this man, they have no way to survive. If a woman is confident enough, has her own spiritual subject and independent personality, she will definitely not tolerate a man trampling on her dignity, daring to challenge her, and daring to stick to her bottom line.
Thirdly, subject to the constraints of children
More often than not, women are afraid to argue with men and choose to leave them, often because they cannot bear the constraints of their children. Women often sacrifice their own happiness for the sake of their children. Sometimes, when a woman does this, it may not necessarily be a great thing, but rather a foolish thing. Imagine, in marriage, can one seek justice for the so-called children? If we truly aim for the healthy growth of our children, we should create a harmonious and happy growth environment for them, rather than providing them with a superficial marital integrity.
Fourth, being weak and lacking in spirit, afraid to face one's own failures
In the final analysis, women are defeated in the betrayal of men, or are destroyed by their own weakness and lack of competitiveness. How should women win their dignity? We must have a strong inner heart, possess courage, dare to face our own failures, and possess a bit of wisdom. Don't feel that a man who betrays himself is a shame and incompetence to himself. He should dare to face reality, dissect himself, never be a weak and incompetent person, face reality directly, and dare to fight against fate.
Therefore, in marriage, a man's betrayal is not scary. What's scary is that as a woman, after a man's infidelity, you cannot control your emotions well, find the crux of the problem, and then calmly examine the current situation of the marriage and face the real problems. As long as you recognize the situation and see right and wrong, you will definitely be able to come out of a failed marriage and overcome everything in front of you.
