Post Date December, 02 2023
Teacher Shu Song: Hello!
I no longer have the strength to love now. A 29 year old man, still a virgin, may not be believed when spoken, but it is a fact.
I don't know where the problem lies?
I graduated from university and am a civil servant. I have 172 people, and my facial features are also considered acceptable,.
Sometimes I don't understand why no one comes to love.
I live in a county town with a decent economy. Perhaps it's because I demand too much and I don't want to make do with myself, so I missed out on many girls introduced by others. Some have poor jobs, some have poor personalities, and some are too unattractive. That's it. As I get older year by year, it becomes difficult. I really don't understand why?
I have a good personality, good job, and good character. Why is there no one to love me?
Additionally, there seem to be few opportunities for us to find the opposite sex here. Sometimes think about becoming a monk without a suitable one. But I'm a bit unwilling. Can you give me good suggestions and opinions? thank you!
Lonely Walker
Lonely Walker; Hello!
First of all, I want to tell you that being a true monk is not done because of avoidance. That requires great courage and eagerness - to explore and revise the inner world. The hardships we endure and the tears we shed are much greater than those of us ordinary people. That is a path that goes against the current: people with a strong sense of fame and fortune cannot do it, nor can those who evade themselves.
I once interviewed a great monk. He was once a top scorer in the college entrance examination in Hubei, and was admitted to the Philosophy Department of Peking University with the confusion of 'who am I'. Because he left home without getting an answer. He is young, handsome, and talented. But the reality of fame and fortune did not tempt him. But there is a fervent desire for spiritual purification. He once said a sentence that showed people how much he loved monastic life: even if I was the only one left in the temple, I would stay here. This reminds people of Master Hongyi who abandoned fame and fortune and resolutely became a monk-- This is a very solemn thing!
If you have the above determination, let's talk about becoming a monk again! Otherwise, it would be more down-to-earth to be a layman. what you think?
When it comes to why no one loves you, I want to ask why you have to wait for someone else and not take the initiative to love them? Is it because of timidity and inferiority? Love is the result of a two-way choice, that is, if someone actively shows their love to you, is it okay to be a girl?
You talked about a lot of external conditions and said about yourself: I graduated from university, a civil servant, with 172 people, and my facial features are also considered acceptable. But I haven't mentioned your inner state at all, it's not as good as your personality and emotional intelligence. You may not have that much understanding of yourself yet. But in the long run, these are the key to sexual relationships. So, I hope you can start by understanding your inner state.
Furthermore, it seems that you still don't quite accept being a virgin. This mentality may be the result of comparison. The most important thing for a person to achieve psychological balance is to accept themselves. Accept your appearance, family, work... and then talk about improvement.
If you feel sexually suppressed, you can maintain moderate exercise every day.
I suggest you read more books on psychological counseling. And turn from seeking from the outside to seeking from the inside.
