My husband hugged me at night and called out other women's names, but I slapped her in the face angrily

I am 47 years old, and my husband is almost 50 years old. We have a son who has already found a girlfriend and is about to get married. Just three months ago, one night, my husband drank a little too much alcohol and called out a woman's name while sleeping. I immediately felt ridiculous and hateful, slapping him awake. He admitted my mistake and said good things to me, but later I realized that they were actually in contact. My friend also met them climbing mountains together. After having dinner with my intimate husband, the same woman went to pick him up. He didn't come back that night, and that dinner was actually a conversation that his intimate husband urged him to turn around. I also used his older brother and sister to persuade him. He seemed determined to divorce a few days ago, and I wanted to give up. But he suddenly turned 180 degrees and talked to me about wanting to live a good life with me, saying that we were a couple for decades, He couldn't let me go, he still loved me, his son, and his family, so I accepted. But I found out that they still had text messages to contact, so I occasionally reminded him that if he really wanted to live a good life, it would be completely over. Later on, he also restrained a lot and lost contact, and we seemed to be back in the past. But the night before yesterday, he was drinking outside at noon again. He went home at 12 pm to sleep and replayed that scene, holding me and calling the woman's name. I really collapsed and slapped him twice. He was blindfolded and said he didn't know what he had done? Blame me me for making trouble out of nothing. He said he only wants to have a good time with me now and doesn't think of anything else. I don't believe him and he accused me of not slapping him. I said how should I live these days, and I said divorce! Since you love her so much and can't let her go, I will help you both. He said he can divorce, but he won't spend time with her now and doesn't want to spend time with me. He just wants to spend it alone. He came back yesterday afternoon and cooked for his son, but he didn't come back all night. I am very confused now, don't know what to do? Help me!

reply:

Hello, couples should learn to tolerate and understand each other when they are together. Moreover, at the age of forty without confusion and fifty knowing fate, one should face the problems between spouses rationally and learn to view each other's every move with maturity. Your husband appeared twice in his sleep holding you and shouting out the name of another woman, both after drinking alcohol. Although his actions made you feel very uncomfortable, you did not catch him causing any substantial harm or betrayal to you. Therefore, you should not be too angry. After all, your husband's attitude of admitting mistakes is still very good, indicating that he did not intentionally act subjectively, He still cherishes your feelings and this family. Even if there may be some improper dealings between him and that woman, if he can correct his mistake, he should still be given a chance to repent. He may indeed have a deep longing for that woman. He planted her in his heart and engraved her name in his memory, which is also a helpless thing. After all, everyone's life is not just about holding one woman in their heart. You have to give him this freedom because you cannot control his heart. The only thing you can do is to treat him better and make him completely agree with you, so that he can replace that woman with you; Alternatively, if you want to be a woman who doesn't rub the sand in your eyes or a woman who closes your eyes, you can choose to follow the truth in your heart.