Post Date December, 03 2023
My husband is eight years older than me. I work in a restaurant. He and his fellow villagers work in a motorcycle dealership near my restaurant. They often come to our store for dinner. After a long time, we become familiar with each other and have a good feeling for each other. My husband's biggest characteristic is that he likes to talk. I feel that he knows a lot. I am very willing to talk with him. I can learn about astronomy, geography, and various religions from him. My husband also boasts that when there are many people, he can only make people stare. My husband is very knowledgeable in my eyes. My parents felt that my husband was glib and not on the right track. They resolutely disagreed with us and even put me under house arrest. Later, when I found an opportunity to elope with him, my parents agreed with us.
Even if our parents disapprove of our marriage, they still care about us after marriage. My parents helped me a lot when I had children and bought a house. Now my son is in the third grade. My husband has been running business in a company for more than half a month. My family is supported by me alone. Since my son went to school, I have moved into a new house in the city. My grandfather and grandmother worked at home to earn money to build a house for his brother. There was no way to help me take care of the child, so I had to quit my job to take care of my son's school. I'm not very good at learning English, and I'm not very good at educating children. Even children hate me and don't let me manage my homework every time. My husband is also getting busier and busier, but he often comes back after dinner, either leaning on the sofa to play with his mobile phone, or going out to play with his friends until midnight. I asked him to spend some time educating his children. He always used such excuses. Later, we often quarreled over the education of our children. At the end of the quarrel, he said that we should divorce. The children and the house belong to me. He left the house clean. After all, we don't have much difference. At this time, I have to change the subject and say something else.
This year, my father suffered from cancer and was in the late stage. My mother knew that she was close to collapse and couldn't take care of my father at all. I handed the child over to relatives to take care of him. My husband asked for leave and went home to take care of my father, but still didn't save my father's life. After my father settled down, I quietly returned the money my father had saved here to my mother. My mother saw that our husband and wife took care of my father very carefully and wanted to give me money, which I declined. It was my responsibility and obligation to take care of my father. This money was his old man's money to keep his peace. How can I afford the old man's money?
A few days ago, my husband quarreled to buy a car. I don't think there is much money left at home. I still have to pay the mortgage. I don't have a job. What kind of car to buy! Although my husband didn't say anything, he was not happy in his heart. Later, I thought that he must be thinking about the money my father saved here! I told him clearly that all the money had been given to my mother, and my husband's face suddenly overcast.
At the beginning of the new semester this year, my sister's son changed to a school in the sixth grade. At noon, he was going to have a small dinner table. The child was willing to come to my house for dinner. My sister discussed with me about the child's coming to my home for a period of time. Although I knew that the child who was in charge of other people would be thankless, and would offend others if it could not be done well, but I had to agree if my sister spoke to her. Because my husband quarreled with my sister because of his words when my father was in hospital. He said that he would not communicate with each other at that time. Now when he saw me bringing my sister's children home, he was very angry. He even asked me whether I wanted my sister or husband. I naturally wanted both. The result was another cold war.
My children are hard to deal with, and my sister's children are not obedient. After eating for half a month, I am exhausted. I really regret receiving this post from my sister. My husband has been making more trouble recently. Today, he gave me his best shot. If he left my sister's child here, he would divorce me, or leave the child and house to me. He went out of the house and took out the divorce agreement for me to sign. What should I do?
Ms. Zhao:
Hello!
From your narration, Yage can see that your husband is not really divorced, but just uses divorce as an excuse. It seems very helpful to say that he is clean and out of the house. In fact, he has eaten your heart and you can't bear to divorce. If you really want to divorce, he will dump the burden on you, and you will bow to him under the pressure of life. It's very tiring to take care of children. If you want a house, you can't work or live. Finally, you will return to him. You simply don't want the children to take the part of the house that they deserve, and you may as well separate them temporarily, let them take care of the children, and often take care of the taste of children's education. Don't stand and talk without pain, maybe you will change your mind. However, draw the bow moderately and don't break the string. Your sister's children are not easy to manage. Simply explain the situation to your sister and let your sister figure out how to do it. You can't separate the husband and wife for this matter.
