Unexpectedly discovering that my husband may be bisexual has made me particularly devastated

I am 28 years old this year, my husband is 27 years old, and my son is now 3 years old. He is also pregnant with a second child. My husband and I have been married for four years, and he is very kind to me. He also works diligently, and I am quite satisfied with him in all aspects.

However, more than two months after we got married in 2011, suddenly one night, in the second half of the night, a man crazily knocked on my door. After my husband opened the door, the man entered my house and cursed me incessantly. Then, my husband went over and pulled him downstairs. When I heard that they hadn't moved, I went downstairs and chased him out. At that time, I saw them arguing fiercely downstairs about something, and I asked them what was going on? My husband has been blocking me all the time, and then he pulled me aside and told me that the man was gay and even said he was a jerk in society.

At that time, I felt confused when I heard it. The person next to me was constantly scolding me, which made me very angry. Later, the man left. My husband is going to deliver shoes to that man, but I won't let him go. He says he's afraid that man will kill him or something. But I resolutely took him back home. After he returned home, he confessed to me that he had applied for a QQ number a few days after I returned to his mother's house, and he used this QQ to contact the gay man. Can't my husband be a legendary bisexual?

Actually, I never thought there was anyone outside of the husband's union because our relationship and life as a couple had always been very normal. Before getting pregnant, we could do that three or four times a week, but after giving birth, it was very rare.

Just a few days ago, I planned to stay at my mother's house for a few more days. In order to understand what my husband would do at home and to discover some clues and clues, I secretly installed a camera at home before leaving. However, after I returned, I did not expect to discover a secret that made me feel particularly worried. I saw in the surveillance video that my husband was constantly playing with his phone and computer, I also saw him watching some gay pornographic movies. I feel particularly nauseous and unable to accept it when I think about it now. From this, I understand what kind of relationship the gay man who came to my house that day had with my husband. My emotional world has collapsed, and now I really don't know what to do?

reply:

1. There are always unpredictable variables in this world. You dare not imagine what changes will happen to your life, who can predict what will happen to you in the next second? Just like you, I never imagined that the lover who had been with me would become a homosexual and bisexual person a few years later.

2. In my letters, I have received letters from "gay men" more than once, in which they freely and sincerely express and confide in their joys, sorrows, excitement, and confusion in the world of gay men, sometimes making me truly unaware. There's no way, after all, we were born in China, not the United States. In a society that currently cannot fully tolerate and understand same-sex love, this emotional relationship can only be hidden and performed in a private space. For this reason, some men and women with homosexual tendencies can only painfully conceal their true inner selves and join in the seemingly normal marriage and love emotions, using conventional marriage relationships to mask their inner alternative desires.

3. Your husband's various signs have already indicated that he may be a true bisexual group. What should we do? The fact is already present in front of us, avoiding is not the solution to the problem, let's face the reality directly. You don't want to face it, you have to face it. Faced with your husband's unbearable situation, you either choose to endure it or choose to have a showdown with him. However, a man with such a sexual psychological tendency cannot be easily solved in a short period of time or with any good solution. Perhaps, he will be in this state throughout his life. Why don't you keep quiet and go to a professional psychological clinic for relevant consultation to see if you can get treatment? If possible, can we conduct public consultations with our husband and go to relevant departments for adjustment.

4. In short, it is indeed unfortunate for you to have such an encounter, and I deeply sympathize with you. However, as a party, no matter how much I comfort you, it can only temporarily reassure you. In the end, you have to rely on your own inner strength to overcome the nightmare in front of you. Where to go and where to go, I hope you still follow your own heart. Perhaps, many things, once you think about them, it doesn't matter. The pain becomes numb, and you don't take it seriously. Handle them according to your own bottom line.

Anyway, you need to cherish yourself, take care of your children, and shoulder the responsibility of being a mother. Life must continue, I think everything will pass. Take your eyes down and see right and wrong. Since fate has given you twists and turns, you can only face it with strength and courage.