My husband works outside all the year round. His first love asked me to drink and talk about the past. He made a mistake and refused to forgive me

At the age of 25, I met my current husband through blind date. I like children when I was young. I studied as a kindergarten teacher and worked in the kindergarten in my hometown. My husband is ambitious and wants to return to his roots in a big city. After getting married, we went on our honeymoon. Then he went to work in a big city, and I stayed at home to work and take care of my family. In this way, we get together less and leave more. The longer I stay, the more I feel uneasy.

The marriage lasted for a year, and my heart was empty. I kept complaining to my husband on the phone. When will this day end. My husband comforted me that in a few years, he would take me over, and then we would have a baby, and I would take care of the baby full-time. It took more than three years to endure such a day. But in three years, he did not make much progress. Although he also saved some money, he could not afford to pay down for a house. I gradually lost confidence in him. At this time, first love entered my life again.

I don't know where my first love got my contact information. To be exact, he dumped me when I broke up. When I was lost, he stepped into my life again. At the moment of receiving his call, the familiar voice made me unable to calm my heart. He asked me to have dinner, but I refused, but I really wanted to see him. After all, he still knew me and found a lot of reasons that I couldn't refuse. I arrived on time, and he drove a luxury car to pick me up. Not seen for a long time, he has matured a lot and his temperament has also improved.

During the meal, the two people couldn't find a topic to talk about. It was embarrassing. After a few drinks, we talked a lot. The more I talked, the more I became excited. I cried that my married life was not easy. I didn't know how much I drank. I vaguely remembered that I was sleepy. Then someone kissed me and hugged me. After waking up, I unexpectedly slept naked in his arms. I screamed with fear, and he looked embarrassed. I put on my clothes and ran home in confusion.

When this happened, I really didn't have the face to see my husband. First love kept calling and texting me to apologize. I blackmailed him, but forgot to delete the message. My husband came back from other places and accidentally saw my text message. He was furious and said that I had broken shoes with him on my back. No matter how I explained it, he didn't believe it and wouldn't forgive me. Scold me and kill me. Since then, he snubbed me, didn't share a room with me, didn't even make a phone call outside, and treated me as the air.

When I asked for a divorce, he said "I won't be so cheap". He will make me feel guilty and let me blame myself. Excuse me, what should I do?

Reply from the consultant:

If the couple live apart for a long time, their mentality will change. If one side is lonely and the other side ignores the feelings of the other side, it is easy to have emotional displacement. You and your husband have been together for a long time. In this marriage, you have not devoted yourself to it. Marriage is not a child's play. How can it be perfect without careful management. Now no one understands your pain. At this time, it happens that someone else has taken a chance. You find the object to talk to, and you can do that kind of thing at the touch of the trigger. You can't say that you are not responsible, but that you have not controlled your emotions.

Now your husband tries to vent to you in a cold and violent way. He just makes you feel guilty and blames yourself, and he feels comfortable. After all, I worked hard outside and got the betrayal of my wife. No matter which man, I can't accept this fact. If you still want to continue with this marriage, I suggest that you do a good job of reflection, open your husband's heart knot, let him accept you again, examine the shortcomings of your marriage, and solve the problem of your separation, so that you can better manage your marriage, which will destroy the marriage sooner or later.