After giving birth to a child, my wife has no time to care about me. After I cheated and married my lover, I began to regret it

When my wife and I fell in love, we were like glue. After a year of love, we became a family. She holds a managerial position in a cosmetics company with a cheerful personality and good popularity; I am in the IT industry and am introverted in personality. After three years of marriage, she became pregnant, and I was surprised and delighted by the arrival of the child. Watching myself upgrade to become a father, I am particularly happy. Treat your wife like a treasure, ask her to resign and have a good baby at home, and leave the matter of making money to men. The wife was very relieved and was at home in peace of mind.

When she's idle at home, she feels bored. I often watch soap operas and then come over and ask, "Will I cheat when I'm pregnant?"? "I swear to her that the word 'cheating' has never appeared in my dictionary!"! My earnest appearance made my wife laugh. The next days will not be easy for me. "Her body is getting heavier and heavier, and her temper is getting weirder and weirder. She often quarrels with me over trivial matters. I am worried and never argue with her, but I always endure it.". I searched the internet and found that her temper has a lot to do with pregnancy.

"But I've been holding on like this, and I feel like I've lost my nerve.". After all, I broke my promise and had a relationship with a girl a few years younger. Specifically, it was just an outlet for extramarital sex, which lasted until my wife gave birth and we finally broke up. I thought my lively and cheerful wife would come back after the baby was born. "However, in the following years, my wife devoted almost all her energy to children and work, and gradually lost interest in sex.". Every time I come to feel it, she always refuses me with a very tired look.

"I don't think life is as good as when she was pregnant, and I lived gracefully.". "I borrow wine to drown my sorrows, and when I feel depressed, I find my buddies to drink and chat.". During drinking, I met a girl named Qiqi, who was considerate and listened to my complaints and complaints, comforted me, gave me advice, and helped me get rid of the haze. Thinking of the wife who refused me thousands of miles away at home and comparing her to the considerate girl outside, Qi Qi, made me feel a big difference. So after work, I would rather stay with friends and meet Qiqi by chance than go home to face my wife and children.

Gradually, I found myself hooked on Qiqi, and my relationship with my wife entered a vicious circle. The more she nagged me, the more I hated her. The marriage held on for another period of time, but eventually broke down. She sensed my abnormality, stalked me secretly, and caught me on the spot. "I couldn't argue. She cried and tore me up. I increasingly felt that she was too crazy, not as good as Qiqi.". My wife couldn't resist this betrayal and chose to divorce me. "The child is her life, and I didn't argue with her for custody.".

Qi Qi and I have cohabited, and she spends her time at the bar on me, never wasting time on cooking and washing clothes. She pulls me around whenever she has time, and her credit card can be maxed out by her. When the style of the dress was slightly outdated, she threw it into the trash can. I said she should save and not waste so much. She just played coquettish and said to me, "You are responsible for making money and supporting the family, and I am responsible for being beautiful as good.". "There's more than just why," he said. "I can't hear it without feeling good.". "I think of my wife, who makes money on her own and has to take care of her children. And as I divorce her, the more I think about it, the more I feel like I'm not a human being.".

I can't stand living with Qiqi for less than half a year. She never interferes with my freedom, nor does she allow me to interfere in her affairs. I rarely cook or wash clothes for me, and when things happen, I think of using money to solve them. Within half a year, she spent a large part of my savings. "I get together with friends and socialize, but she never cares when I come back, let alone when I sleep together.". Previously, my wife would wait for me to come back late at night before she could sleep peacefully. I thought she was very annoying and sticky at the time. Now think about it, this kind of person is the one who cares most about me.

The conflict between Qiqi and I continued to deepen. In that quarrel, I proposed a divorce and signed the agreement. She was also angry, signed the divorce agreement without saying a word, packed up and went out in anger. "I don't even have the strength to pursue her, and after half a year of cohabitation, I was exhausted by her struggles.". Later, when I learned that my wife was still single, I secretly congratulated myself. I regret that I betrayed my wife. I want to recover my wife again. After a while, I realized that the person who really cared about me was my first wife. But when I went to find her, I was repeatedly shut down. She didn't want to see me or let the child see me, saying that I wasn't worthy to be the child's father. I know she hates me, and I'm not sure if she still has feelings for me. Please help me analyze it. Is there any hope that I can recover my wife?

Reply from the maintenance consultant:

Hello. "Monogamy" is recognized through national and cultural identity. Couples should be loyal to their love and treat their partner as the only spiritual and emotional partner. This relationship is not allowed to be shared with others. Once one party falls in love with others or betrays their body, it can be fatal to the other party.

After analyzing your situation, the conflict between you and your wife starts from having a child. A person's energy is limited, and she has to take care of the child, but she also has to be busy with her own work, and she has no separation skills. The kind of tiredness can be imagined. As for you, even if you don't help, I blame my wife for not caring about you. "She cried with you and let out her grievances. Instead of reflecting on yourself, you became even more disgusted with her. You were so much in love with your little lover, how could you embarrass your wife?".

"Now that you have reacted, a lover is only a temporary stimulus that cannot provide you with permanent stability. It is still the best match between husband and wife.". It's understandable that she won't forgive you, after all, you hurt her so deeply. Time is a good medicine for healing wounds. Use time to exchange space.

Apologize thoroughly to her, let her feel your sincerity, express your love for her and her child, and through the child's perspective, request your wife to give you a chance for the child. The child is small, and without a healthy home, physical and mental health will also be affected. I believe that if she has feelings for you, she will slowly accept you. Cherish your marriage and treat your first wife well.